Every time I eat confection

It goes straight to my complexion.

Munch a chunk of chocolate candy -

There's a blemish. What a dandy!

For dessert, some cherry pie;

Brand new zit, beneath my eye.

A piece of cake (and very thin!) -

There's a pimple on my chin.

It's a curse, and don't I know it!

Thought by now I might outgrow it!

In exchange for sugared sweets,

I get acne for my treats.

In this whole wide world, I'd wager,

I'm the oldest damn teenager!

Cigarettes'll

Rot your health,

And booze'll take

Your hard-earned wealth

And turn your liver

Into rock.

So if you're sick

And deep in hock,

And wond'ring "What

The heck's the use?"

And searching for

A good excuse

For looking like

A burnt-out clod,

And feeling like

The wrath of God;

Try your luck with

Butts and drinking,

And smile as your

Ship is sinking!